It can be learned by regular individuals to deflect negative thoughts and replace them with more positive statements to provide motivation and encouragement.
I’m not talking about “positive affirmations” or “law of attraction” stuff here but thinking a different way or more correctly talking a differently way.
Be aware this may require considerable effort as it can require changing your whole outlook on life as in seeing the proverbial glass as half-full rather than half-empty. Our view of the world – or beliefs – are heavily influenced by what we were exposed to early on in life, usually by parents.
Because of this don’t expect many years of influence and reinforcement by others to suddenly change overnight.
Here’s a simple example to start us rolling, and then we’ll consider a slightly more complicated reframing technique.
Weight Loss Example Before:
If I have a client whose been trying to lose weight for a long time they’ll usually use some variation of the following words:
“I’ve never been successful at losing weight” or “Try as I can I can’t lose weight.”
Left alone these words send a powerful message to the brain that you’ll never be successful at losing weight, or you just can’t lose weight and it doesn’t matter what you do or how hard you try.
Glass half-empty, right?
Your subconscious mind doesn’t judge those words as good or bad but hears the message and will do what it has to do to make sure it comes true.
Weight Loss Example After:
So now we need to change the message to something like:
“Up until now I haven’t been successful at losing weight” or “Up until now I haven’t been able to lose weight.”
Essentially, what you’ve done is put all the unsuccessful attempts behind you in the past and given yourself a clean slate moving forward. A new chance unencumbered by previous failed attempts.
Yes, it is a small change in words and subtle, but it’s a powerful reframe technique, and sends a completely different message than before to our subconscious.
Let’s take this to the next level.
A context reframe is when you reinterpret a behavior viewed as negative to view it as a positive trait. For example you may have a family member or friends you view as “too aggressive” or “too quiet.”
View those individual’s in different context where “being aggressive” will help an individual succeed because they don’t let anything stand in their way, or the person who is “too quiet” hasn’t got a big ego and provides an opportunity for others to shine.
Context reframe takes a little more skill and practice but it’s where therapists utilizing NLP Reframing spend a lot of time as it requires interpretive skills.
Reframing is a powerful tool and the person who can reinterpret negative thoughts so it empowers will help not only themselves but others. Once you put this into practice you’ll experience different views and interpretations on family, friends, and co-workers that can literally make all the difference in the world.
For those of you that want to learn more about this subject then Robert Dilts has a book called Sleight of Mouth.
Filed Under: NLP Central